My gaining weight seems to have something to do with growing up. I now have a real adult body.
For many years, I wanted a boyish look – no hips, thighs or boobs. As an anorexic in my late 20s, I didn’t get my period for several years – my body looked childlike and weak. And I liked it that way.
Always, I acted like a child. I never saved money or developed a career or built an intimate relationship or really learned, in anyway, how to truly take care of myself. Mostly, i focused on dieting and then drugs and alcohol – anything to avoid reality and responsibility.
But I’m not a child anymore, and I’m finally ready to accept adulthood and all that comes with it. Including the thighs.