Generally, I like to complain about stuff on this blog. I started a post about the porn industry. A young porn star, August Ames, just took her own life at the age of 23. According to her husband and her friends, she’d been suffering severe depression for a long time.. Ms. Ames had starred in over 170 films in the last 4 years. That’s a lot of…porn.
My take on the porn industry is that it holds so much sadness and pain. Granted, I don’t know a heck of a lot about it… (Still, I don’t understand the appeal.)
BUT, I decided not to rant on this particular post (well, at least not too much.) Because everything truly is fine in my life.
I think if most of us stop and really look at the truth of our lives – most of it really is fine. Of course, some are suffering deep deep pain and sadness, but at this moment, I’m not.
I look at the loss of August Ames – a beautiful young woman. Her experience of life was not fine at all. Imagine being in such excruciating pain in your 20s that you would choose to take your own life? I was absolutely miserable at 23 – a compulsive eater, bulimic, anorexic and budding alcoholic and drug addict. I hated my job, had miserable relationships and carried a truly scary amount of debt. but it never occurred to me to kill myself. I still had hope.
And I was right to hope. I found a way out from under all the addiction and now get to live a free and good life.. Never in my wildest dreams did I think I could live life not chained to food. It’s miraculous.
A job, friends, family and always, hope……..What more could a middle aged cat lady hope for?
It’s a good question to asks ourselves – what’s good in my life? What do I take for granted that other people don’t have? How lucky am I?